My Farewell to Animal

The Legendary Road Warriors, Hawk and Animal

(Nicholas Dye/Staff Writer)

My first introduction to the world of wrestling came around 1983. My good friend Joe Barnum had introduced me to the WWF and, if I remember correctly, the first match I watched was Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake and Greg “The Hammer” Valentine vs. The Killer Bees. It was right then and there that I decided that if I were to ever become a wrestler I wanted to be part of a tag team.

As a fan of the WWF, there was no shortage of teams to watch. The Hart Foundation, British Bulldogs and eventually, Demolition, just to name a few. It was during this time that I had first heard the rumblings of a wildly destructive team that didn’t wrestle for the WWF. A team that wore face paint and spikes like Demolition, but were waaaay bigger and scarier. I quickly discovered that they were a team featured on a promotion I had never heard of at that age, the WCW. Nevertheless, I managed to get a hold of a VHS recording when I was ten of the infamous “Scaffold Match” that featured the Midnight Express taking on the Road Warriors. When the Road Warriors were introduced, I sat wide-eyed and transfixed on my television. Hawk and Animal emerged from the curtain and it was like they belonged in my collection of Masters of the Universe figures. I thought it was so cool Animal had a spider painted on his forehead and I was fucking arachnophobic! From that moment forward, the only thing that could pull me away from my beloved WWF was to briefly tune in to WCW to see the greatest tag team to ever come out of the mean streets of Chicago.

Hawk was massive and powerful and damn fast but it was Animal, who was the true crushing power of that team. I would live to watch two things happen in their matches. The first, was to see Animal perform the most devastating and flawless scoop powerslam and the second was to see him hoist their victim (that’s what they really were people!!) upon his shoulders and to see Hawk sail from the top rope to deliver a clothesline that was aptly called “The Doomsday Device.” Every single time they were on the screen, it was like seeing a comic book character come to life. They looked like characters that Conan the Barbarian would try to avoid. I would have countless conversations with my friends about how I wish they would come to the WWF. On July 15, 1990, I got my wish.

From day one, the Legion of Doom were predefined to be the champs. They quickly feuded with teams like Demolition, the Powers of Pain, and the Nasty Boys. I lived to watch Animal point two thumbs towards the ceiling, calling Hawk to set up for the Doomsday Device. He and Hawk would cut the best promos and you always felt like they just might actually pull another wrestler’s head off. Whatever you call them, the Road Warriors or the Legion of Doom, are my definitive answer to the “who’s the best tag team ever” question. Just as inevitable as their rise to success, Hawk and Animal were inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame in 2011.

It would be years later that I would actually learn Animal’s name. Joe Laurinaitis. He became a very proud father who helped his son become one of the most feared lineman in college football and saw him play in the NFL for the New Orleans Saints and the Los Angeles Rams. Sadly, Joe Laurinaitis passed yesterday at the age of 60. He was revered in the back in every promotion and he lived to give his all to fans and to his family. Thanks for everything Animal, it has been a rush. Below is there entrance music and my favorite entrance of theirs ever. Summerslam 1992.

PS5 Presale Goes Bananas

PS5 and PS5 Digital

(Nicholas Dye/Staff Writer)

This week Sony gave us a huge update and preorder details for the highly anticipated PlayStation 5. Well…as of publishing…the PS5 preorders have come and gone. By that I mean the major sites such as Best Buy, Amazon, and Wal-Mart are already showing sold out. Sony, however, has vowed that they will deliver more for preorder and they will be available for pickup or delivery by the November 12th release date.

So here’s what we know so far. PlayStation 5 will come in two versions with two different price points. The PS5 is priced at $499 and comes with an Ultra 4K BluRay player for those dedicated to discs. The PS5 Digital is priced at $399 and will feature no disc drive for those preferring to download their games onto the hard drive. Surprisingly, they don’t come with a terabyte of storage like the PS4 Pro did but has something that I believe will crush the upcoming XBOX Series X. Both PlayStations feature an 825GB SSD drive. “What does that mean for me” you ask? Basically an SSD or Solid State Drive, uses less energy to load and perform which eliminates lag times. It allows game designers to give you maps that have zero load time from area to area. Think of Skyrim or Red Dead Redemption 2 with 3-4 times the area and no lag in rendering or gameplay. The SSD can be easily upgraded for more storage should you need it but this will be a game changer for console players.

Lastly, I would be an asshole if I didn’t talk about the catalog of games that will be available at release. Here’s what we’ve seen so far:

  • Astro’s Playroom
  • Demon Souls
  • Destruction All-Stars
  • Godfall
  • Just Dance 2021
  • Marvel’s Spider-Man: Miles Morales
  • Sackboy: A Big Adventure

Along with these titles, retro titles will be provided in the PlayStation Store such as God of War (super excited about this), The Last of Us Remastered and a ton of other classic titles. Check back as we get close to launch date for more updates!

The Dune Trailer is Here!!!

(Nicholas Dye/Staff Writer). Warner Bros. and Legendary Pictures just dropped the trailer for the upcoming DUNE directed by Denis Villeneuve. From the look of the beating “wings” of the ornithopters to the Gom Jabbar held by the reverend mother, this looks to be the truest adaptation of Frank Herbert’s seminal science fiction masterpiece. I shall prattle on no more. Here is the trailer for Dune slated for a December 18th 2020 release.

SHOW US YOUR JUNK! August Edition.

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(Joshua Gilmore-Staff Writer)

Since the post office can’t deliver any cease and desist orders, Nowhere California is back with another edition of SHOW US YOUR JUNK! I’m stepping back in front of the camera to show you what I got and continuing the feud with Nick that only seems to appear in this forum.

The Nano Gauntlet is currently available on multiple sites, but I would highly recommend picking up this item directly through HASBRO Pulse. You can CLICK HERE and head over to that site.

As I mentioned in the video, WE WANT TO SEE YOUR JUNK! Feel free to send us a message through our normal social media channels, like www.facebook.com/nowherecalifornia or send us an e-mail at nowhere_california@yahoo.com.

A Look From Nowhere At Suicide Squad:Kill The Justice League

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(Joshua Gilmore-Staff Writer)

The world of pop culture is still feeling the after effects of the DC Fandome and our favorite villainous squad are jumping from the page to the screen to the next generation of video game consoles.

The Nowhere California team will be diving deep into the first images from “The Suicide Squad” movie, but we have to take a look at the next game from the creative minds behind the legendary Arkham City franchise, Rocksteady Studios.

The members of Task Force X have entered the battle damage city limits of Metropolis, they have one mission and one goal. The mission is to eliminate a target and their goal is to get time erased from their prison sentences, but there is one huge problem and that is the target. Harley Quinn (voiced by Tara Strong), Captain Boomerang, Deadshot, and King Shark (voiced by WWE superstar Samoa Joe) have to take down Superman. Will the goal outweigh the mission? Also, from the title of the game, we can only imagine that the team will have a lot more on their plates.

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Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League will not hit stores until 2022, but this first look has given the world something to be excited for and is given me a reason to possibly upgrade my current video game system.

Show Us Your Junk…July Edition!

(Nicholas Dye/ Junk Show-er & Podcaster)

We know this is zero hour for the month of July but it was worth the wait in my humble opinion. I don’t mean my godforsaken performance but the junk I want to show you is totally worth it! A quick note, I realize I forgot to mention William Sadler who is also in the panel but again, I’m old and it’s late. So without further ado, here’s Nowhere California’s July Edition of Show Us Your Junk

Comic Con@HOME: Kevin Smith And Killroy Were BLEEPING There..

 

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(Joshua Gilmore-Staff Writer)

The first ever San Diego Comic-Con@HOME is a wrap and the only con crud case is traced to some under cooked pizza rolls in Oxnard. Anyways, there is a lot of announcements and other important news that came from this event, but we have to take a traditional trip to HALL H and check in with the Comic-Con icon Kevin Smith.


Well, I should correct myself, in a year where some traditions have had to change and Comic Con is a great example of this, this traditional trip detoured from HALL H to the Fat Cave. Kevin was true to form and lead the viewers through the current happenings in his universe. We learned about new merchandise and the current status of his future projects, but the biggest surprise came in the form of the world’s first look at “KILLROY WAS HERE”


This film was written by Kevin Smith and Andy McElfresh (co-host of the Edumacation podcast) Also, “KILLROY WAS HERE”  has been in the works for awhile and the concept predates Kevin’s heart attack with Krampus in the lead monster role. Now, that time has passed and another Krampus movie has been released, we get KILLROY and the world is definitely ready.

Kevin describes KILLROY as “kind of like a kid Avenger… if you fuck with kids, KILLROY will show up.”  That is pretty evident from the trailer and some evil fucks will be on the business end of Roy’s rage. The cast is stacked with some of Kevin Smith’s regulars and some new talented individuals are in the mix.

Currently, “KILLROY WAS HERE” does not have a release date or studio for distribution, so continue to watch this site or Kevin Smith’s site/social network for any breaking news.

 

Netflix Is Ready To Sweep The Leg…

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(Joshua Gilmore-Staff Writer)

YouTube had the great idea of starting original programming and this lead to the birth of the series known as “Cobra Kai.” This series is set decades after the original “Karate Kid” films and follows Johnny Lawrence (played by William Zabka). Lawerence is middle aged and running low on luck, so he reopens the infamous Cobra Kai dojo in an attempt to get his life in order.

As the series unfolds, Lawerence begins to teach a band of misfits and crosses paths with ghosts from his pasts, one of the biggest ghosts being Daniel LaRusso (played by Ralph Maccio). LaRusso is now a successful car dealer and has issues with Lawerence reopening the dojo, leading to their famous martial-arts rivalry restarting.

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Since Cobra Kai’s May 2018 debut on YouTube, the show has had two incredibly popular seasons and started work on a third season, but YouTube changed their plans and pulled the plug on their original series. This could have been the end of “Cobra Kai”, but the show was able to quickly find a new home at Netflix.

On August 28th 2020, the first two seasons of “Cobra Kai” will be released on the streaming platform and, hopefully, this will quickly lead to an announcement for the release of season 3.

Bill and Ted Face the Music Trailer #2

Bill and Ted Shredding MOST Excellently

(Nicholas Dye/Staff Writer)

The time has come for the second trailer and this time, it seems, our boys have run out of time while their kids are traveling…time…Oh look, I’ve gone cross-eyed. The second trailer for Bill and Ted Face the Music gives us a bigger glimpse at the lives Bill and Ted lead now and it seems things have taken a bogus turn. The guys are in marriage counseling, the future has given them a day to save the universe, their kids have gone to hell, and they still haven’t written THE song! Will the Wyld Stallyns save the universe or is 2020 really the year the world ends? Find out August 28th when Bill and Ted Face The Music hits theaters.

FLETCH Lives… Again?

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(Joshua Gilmore-Staff Writer)

It’s a given, the world of Hollywood will stick to a sure thing and we are looking down the barrel of more reboots and remakes. The question is what property will be that best bet and Miramax has put their chips on the FLETCH line… again.

The studio has announced that the investigative reporter, originally played by Chevy Chase, will return to the big screen (or small, depending the state of movie viewing) with Jon Hamm entering the role of Irwin “Fletch” Fletcher.

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“Fletch’s duration over audiences – whether told on paper or the big screen – entertains all and we could not be more thrilled to see what twenty-first century twist these artists create,” said Miramax CEO Bill Block.

The FLETCH world has been in a holding pattern for several years, with reboots that have gotten lost in pre-production hell. Now, with this development, the fans of this franchise can look forward a new chapter for this character. Along with acting duties, Hamm will step into the role of producer with manager Connie Tavel. Also, Greg Mottola is set to direct this production and television writer, Zev Borow is set to pen the screenplay.

“Producing this film with Jon has been a long-time dream of mine and with Zev and Greg on board to write and direct, I really believe that this will be an exciting and modern reimagining of this beloved character,” said Tavel.

Since this is a developing story, a production start date hasn’t been announced and details can change at random, but key plot points have been released. The film will be set in modern days, so we’ll not have a 80’s nostalgia flashback, and will take its story from the 1976 novel “Confess, Fletch” In which a mysterious series of events lands Fletch in the middle of multiple murders, with one of the cases names him as a prime suspect. During his attempts to prove his innocence, Fletch has to search for his fiancée’s stolen art collection and this collection is her only inheritance from her missing, but presumed dead father.

The pieces are in the right place and Fletch could stand a chance of a franchise resurrection, but are the modern movie goers ready for the return of this comedy icon or has this hero been lost in the forgotten cult film wastelands. As the film breaks away from the pre-production hell, fans can hope it’s time for Irwin’s return to the spotlight.