Are We Ready For A Jedi Tomb Raider?

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(Joshua Gilmore- Staff Writer)

Could a new generation Jedi bring the life back to forgotten video game movie franchise? As quickly as the Millennium Falcon can make the kessel run, the casting rumor of Daisy Ridley stepping into the boots of Lara Croft has spread through all the Hollywood outlets.

This past week, DEADLINE reported that Warner Bro’s and MGM have possible put Daisy into casting consideration for the upcoming Tomb Raider reboot. Now, with everything in Hollywood, casting and production rumors can change in the blink of an eye. Now, with Daisy’s commitments to the Star Wars franchise, could her name be taken out of the mix as quickly as it was brought in or could this be a post Star Wars project for Rey?

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Tell Us Your Thoughts? Who Do You See Playing Lara Croft?

This Summer…Who you Gonna call?

(Nicholas Dye/Staff Writer)

Yesterday, the world was witness to some unusual paranormal activity that appeared in the form of a free roaming, full-screen movie trailer. That’s right, the long awaited trailer for Paul Feig’s all-female cast of Ghostbusters hit http://www.ghostbusters.com to mixed reactions. We here at Nowhere California absolutely loved our first glimpse into the new world of the Ghostbusters franchise. Kristen Wiig, Melissa McCarthy, Kate McKinnon (By the way, McKinnon as Jillian Holtzmann? My new crush!), and Leslie Jones round out our new Ghostbusters as well as, who we believe will be their super sexy secretary, Chris Hemsworth. The trailer gives us our first glimpse at the new ghosts and a familiar ugly little spud…green…gross…OKAY It’s Slimer. Since the guys at Nowhere gave this to me to write I will hop on a short soapbox for a moment. This may not be our original guys nor a true sequel to the franchise. It is, however, honoring the original with cameos by Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Ernie Hudson, Sigourney Weaver, Annie Potts, the freaking firehouse AND, as I mentioned, Slimer. The hearse they use in this as Ecto-1 is a 1984 Cadillac…you know 1984…like when the first film came out!? So everyone needs to cool their collective jets and just enjoy a new chapter into the Ghostbusters universe! I will be there on July 15th to watch as “A new team will answer the call.”

Welcome To Episode VIII..

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(Joshua Gilmore-Staff Writer)

The end will be the beginning, well at least when it comes to the start of production on Star Wars Episode VIII.

In this teaser released by Lucas Films, production has started on the next installment of the Star Wars franchise and it looks like some questions will be answered very quickly.

As of this posting, very little is known about this installment and the world still waits for the complete title to be released. The information that is known is the cast that will be returning and not returning, if that statement is confusing, then do yourself a favor and get to the movie theater NOW!

Also, there will be some new faces added to this edition of the saga and there are some Hollywood elite that are entering this galaxy. Kelly Marie Tran (About A Boy), Benicio Del Toro (Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas), and Laura Dern (Jurassic Park) will make their marks in the Star War’s Saga, when Episode VIII blasts into theaters December 15,2017

"Worlds, Galaxies, And Universes: Live Action At The Walt Disney Studios" Presentation At Disney's D23 EXPO 2015

The Desecration of the Man of Steel in Hollywood Part 1

(Nicholas Dye/Staff Writer)

I will begin this piece by admitting that I am an ardent and die-hard Superman fan. I am not a fan of what he can do but what he is and what he stands for. I believe that his greatest power radiates not from our yellow sun but from the love and morals that two mere mortals bestowed on him. Superman is super not because of the ability to protect and to do the amazing things he does. Superman is super because of the way he inspires, the way he makes us believe that ANYONE can be super if they make the choice to do so. In this amazing technological world that we live in, why can no one in Hollywood seem to get his character right and why do they almost feel threatened by a hero of his caliber?

From my earliest memories and from pictures of me as a baby, I have been surrounded by Superman. Much like Martha Kent, my mother sewed an ‘S’ onto a red towel and attached it to my long john Superman Underoos and created my costume. I was eight years old an barely a year had passed since my father died. We struggled but we found light in the smallest of places. We lived on a friend’s property in a 65 foot mobile home that we had just upgraded from the 35 footer we were living in. I remember the day she pinned that towel to my shirt and I stepped off the back steps for the first time. The way the sun felt that morning, the way the smell of the desert meeting the mountains filled my nose. The sound of John Williams’ main theme from Superman echoed in the clearing of trees as I belted it out while I ran around with my arms outstretched. Superman was the light I needed to get past losing my hero. In that sense, I had been saved by the Man of Steel.

Fast forward to 2005. I sat with barely contained enthusiasm, in a film that I cannot recall, waiting for the teaser trailer for the upcoming Superman Returns. In that darkened theater, my skin came alive as I heard Marlon Brando’s Jor-El talking over John Willams’ “The Planet Krypton” theme. A young Clark leaps into the sky over the fields of Smallville, Kansas, a glimpse of The Daily Planet, people looking to the sky, Superman emerges from the clouds and basks in the sun, and Jor-El saying; “For this reason alone, their capacity for good, I have sent them you. My only son.” Superman opens his eyes and speeds back to earth. I am not ashamed to admit that tears filled my eyes as thunderous applause and cheers from the audience filled the blackness.

Fast forward again to June of 2006. The credits were rolling on Superman Returns and I sat in absolute disappointment at what Warner Bros. had allowed to happen to MY hero. I was outraged! So let me get this straight…Superman had become a stalker, a jealous ex-boyfriend, and a secret father!? That ridiculous costume with the leather cape and tiny ‘S’ and the fact that we were getting Lex Luthor…AGAIN was enough to drive me around the bend! Hell, the biggest hero in that entire film was James Marsden’s ‘Richard White’ who, even with seeing his love (Lois Lane) still smitten with Superman, rushed off in his plane to help him at her behest. EVERYTHING felt wrong! Superman forgot how to save a falling plane without tearing it apart and the scene where he rushes into the street and pulls his shirt open to reveal the iconic shield was completely muted by the bastardization of the original score by John Ottman. Smallville was able to get this right so I cannot fathom why the film could not. Brandon Routh was made to regurgitate lines which Christopher Reeve had used to bring humanity to Superman and, much like the movie, failed miserably at connecting with the audience.

To paraphrase Alex Ross and Mark Waid’s “Kingdom Come”, the Super has become more important than the man in Hollywood. In Superman ’78, we see the guiding hand of Jonathan and Martha Kent. When Clark shows off by beating Brad’s convertible home on foot, Jonathan ribs him for showing off and letting Brad get his goat. Clark asks if it’s showing off to use your natural talents to which Jonathan tells him that it is not but he knows that he was put here for more than scoring touchdowns. Now granted, we don’t get to see the Kents mold Kal-El into Superman by Jonathan teaching him ways to change his voice and demeanor and we don’t get Martha stitching his costume from the blankets he arrived in. What we do get, which Hollywood seems almost afraid to do, is two parents who love him and guide him morally on his journey to find his greater purpose.

If I am to be fair, Zack Snyder’s Man of Steel came the closest. Jonathan and Clark have a wonderful exchange after Clark is bullied. Martha and Clark have a beautiful moment when Clark’s senses are overwhelmed and she lovingly helps him to focus. Snyder crafts these things and, in the quest to keep more realism, he almost chastises Clark for saving the school bus after it plunged into the river. Jonathan sacrifices himself rather than let Clark do what he can do. While I would say this has some nobility to it, as we learn later in the film, it seems a good chunk of Smallville’s population know who Clark is anyways which would negate Jonathan’s fear completely. I would be remiss if I didn’t mention my favorite scene in the film which happens to be Clark’s finest moment. When faced with the decision to turn himself over to Zod, Clark goes to a higher power for answers. He tells the clergyman at the local church that he is the man that is being sought and he doesn’t know what to do. The clergyman tells him that sometimes it just takes faith.

Again, in Alex Ross’ Justice comic, there is an exchange of respect between Superman and Batman outside of the Fortress of Solitude. Superman acknowledges why Batman is so successful because Batman makes criminals afraid of the dark. Batman says that he know understands why Superman chose to do press appearances and interviews because he casts a light so bright that there are no shadows for the villains to hide in. Why then, do we have a Man of Steel that was shot so overtly darkened. Why does Superman need to be grittier? He is a beacon of light and a symbol of hope! It’s almost as if film executives are afraid to give us a moralistic Superman or one that might seem preachy. I swear I have seen that work on film somewhere before though and it seemed to work pretty damn well. What movie was that again…? Oh yeah!! EVERY movie that has featured Captain America!

Marvel has done so well with giving us a hero that holds his morals above all else. Hell, it was a running gag in Avenger 2: Age of Ultron between Stark and Cap when Stark uses some choice words and Cap says “Language!” Why is Warner so afraid of that guy!? He’s referred to in the comics as “The Big Blue Boy Scout”,  so why not let him be that!? In Superman ’78, in his first outing as Superman, saves Lois Lane from death and catches a falling helicopter with his free hand. Upon returning them to the top of The Daily Planet, he quickly says “Gentlemen. This man needs a doctor!” and then says to Lois, “I hope this hasn’t put you off flight miss. Statistically speaking, it’s still the safest way to travel.” In that sequence he delivers hope, takes control of a chaotic situation and is reassuring without being preachy or condescending.  This sequence is followed by him stopping a burglary and a heist, saving Air Force 1, and rescuing a cat from a tree! Where the hell was that stuff in these new films!?

I believe Henry Cavill is the best man to don the ‘S’ since Christopher Reeve and I hope that Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice will restore my faith but from what I have seen from trailers, that seems bleak. As this is titled “Part 1”, I will be tackling my issues with the need to pit Superman and Batman against each other, the choice to make his costume more Kryptonian, as well as get more into this fear of having a hero that is too moralistic for viewers. I will also, in the near future, be writing a piece on the mistreatment of Batman in Hollywood as well. I will save those both until after we get the theatrical release of Batman v. Superman. Thanks for letting this fanboy rant for a while and feel free to hit me with comments or questions at Nowhere_California@yahoo.com.

 

 

 

 

 

Star Wars: The Force Awakens – I am definitely awake!

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(Pilot Porter.Staff Writer)

I write this now being a little over 4 days from my completion of a movie, which I have been anticipating for my entire life. That is not a dramatic sentiment meant to define the gravitas of my eagerness, I was born in 1984 and Return of the Jedi was premiered in 1982, so the math adds up. Growing up a Star Wars fan I had always heard of the possibility of a final trilogy, but once the prequels were put on the docket I among many others started believing that our anticipated final trilogy was no more, left to the annals of the Extended Universe. But then on October 30th, 2012 a shirtless little mouse announced, his owners will make our final trilogy.

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They will do it fast, and they will throw a bunch of other stuff in as well, just because we asked nicely. Never let it be said that Walt Disney pictures would not make the most profitable drug dealers in the world, if they turned their attention to organized crime. Most of you reading this have probably been following The Wars for quite some time, so I will spare you the boring history lesson. If you would like to discuss Star Wars history, by all means tweet me, @thedougporter!! Since history discussions will be saved for later, I wanted to write about what The Force Awakens has done for me as a…..it pains me to say this….a lapsed Star Wars fan.

Yes, over the last few years my interest in the fandom of Star Wars has been on a slow, slow, slow, sloth like journey to dormancy. That isn’t to say that the Galaxy far far away had been any less important to me, I have it tattooed on my body…TWICE! I just found myself getting less excited with the “day to day” of the Star Wars fandom. But this movie has AWOKEN (PUN) the fan that waited 5 days outside a theatre for Attack of the Clones.

I think it is fair to say at this point if you’re a fan of Star Wars you have seen this movie at least once, but if you haven’t PLEASE COME BACK AFTER YOU’VE SEEN IT, cause there will be rosebud type spoilers aplenty. I will give you a minute to get out of eye sight before I continue….

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Well I think burying the lead at this point is futile so, WTF HAN IS GONE!?!?!?!?!?! I am still in mourning from this scene. I have cried multiple times in my life, but I have wept 4 times in my life. Han’s death was the latest. Now before you judge me for being a copy of cryingfwife.com I would like you to understand something. I spent quite a lot of time growing up by myself watching movies, because as we all know the outside sucks! I would on average watch one of the original trilogy a day. I consistently ran the marathon once I had gotten a TV in my room, so the characters became my pseudo family. Always there when I needed them, never leaving, never making fun of me, always encouraging. Han Solo was the epitome of the man I was hoping to become in my adult life. Now as an adult, I have realized that Han’s death was meant to affect us on an ever deeper level than just losing a familiar figure head, losing Han was the symbol of losing our childhood. The story of Star Wars has always followed Joseph Campbell’s The Hero’s Journey and one of the key turning points is The Death of the Mentor. This is the moment that the hero’s innocent, childlike life, is forever changed and puts said hero on the final part of the journey towards heroism.

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Han was our mentor, he was the non-believer who we could relate to while watching Luke takes these steps into the force. Now, JJ Abrams wants us to take our own journey with Rey, how do we do that? Remove our mentor. By removing our mentor we have to take this journey with her, we have no one else to look to, we alone are the deciders of our destiny. Plus, added bonus Kylo Ren has become just more evil than Darth Vader in the eyes of the fandom. Which will make his inevitable fight with Luke that much sweeter….unless JJ wants to completely tie up all loose ends and kill him too. Wouldn’t that be something, eh?

DEADPOOL:He Can Kill A Man 130 Ways With A Fruitcake..

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(Joshua Gilmore-Staff Writer)

The holiday season brings a mixed bag of emotions and most of them you have to mask, either chemically or with distance. Now, everyone’s favorite Merc with the Mouth has stepped in to help with the emotional denial and bestowed upon us, with the help of MASHABLE.com, a set of emoji featuring DEADPOOL..

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In a world that has an emoji for everything, it’s about time that we received a set that will help us express our frustration with a Deadpool poo or let people know that we need some personal time, by using the pump bottle with Deadpool’s gloves clapping on the side.

If you wish to download these incredible emoji CLICK HERE for MASHABLE.com official post.

This closes out your 8th crazy installment of the madcap 12 Days of Deadpool, stay close to your computer or Deadpool emoji fill phone for tomorrow’s entry from IMAX.

xx

We fight again for our Independence!

(Nicholas Dye/Staff Writer)

This summer will mark 20 years since humankind prevailed over the alien threat and the 4th of July became Global Independence Day. In 2016, that independence will once again be threatened by forces from outside our world and once again Dr. David Levinson (Jeff Goldblum) is racing the clock to protect us. Independence Day: Resurgence is the long awaited follow-up to Roland Emmerich’s mega-summer blockbuster. Bill Pullman and Vivica A. Fox both reprise their roles as President Whitmore and Jasmine respectively yet without Will Smith’s Captain Steven Hiller. Liam Hemsworth joins the fight this time around as planet earth faces down an even bigger alien threat. 20th Century Fox has created a highly immersive website that chronicles the events following the events of 1996. Check it out here at http://www.warof1996.com Will our reverse-engineered alien weaponry be enough to save us again or will planet earth finally fall? Find out June 24, 2016

A Look At X-MEN:APOCALYPSE

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(Joshua Gilmore-Staff Writer)

Apocalypse, in the normal world, can bring fear and pain to humanity. Apocalypse, in the world of mutants, can bring fear and pain to humanity, but Apocalypse can bring a power that the most powerful mutants cannot control.

Since his debut, in May of 1986, Apocalypse has been considered the Alpha and Omega of the mutant world of the X-Men. Now, with the release of the trailer for X-Men:Apocalypse, we will finally see this entity on the big screen…

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It’s hard to gather the right comments to express the excitement for this movie and the year that 2016 will be for movies. Apocalypse continues to show that a MARVEL movie can survive outside of the MARVEL Cinematic Wonderland (AKA Disney) and a stacked list of characters will be treating fairly.

As this is the first trailer for this production, we can only imagine and know that there will be A LOT more to look forward in the weeks leading to the release.

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X-MEN:Apocalypse Will Be In Theaters May 27 2016  

Ninja Turtles 2: Out of the Shadows

(Nicholas Dye/Staff Writer)

Michael Bay’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, love ’em or hate ’em, are set to make their return this coming summer and it looks our “heroes in a half shell” will have a a few new baddies to contend with as well as a very familiar pointed return…see what I did there? Megan Fox is back as April O’Neil as is Will Arnett as her panicky cameraman, Vernon Fenwick. The newcomers to this film will make any Turtles fan thrilled. Joining Shredder are long-time baddies Bebop and Rocksteady played, respectively, by Gary Anthony Williams and WWE Champion Sheamus (billed by his real name Stephen Farrelly). The man who makes it possible to get our favorite baddie warthog and rhino is Baxter Stockman, played by Tyler Perry. Fear not though, the Turtles get some new back up with the introduction of Casey Jones, played by Arrow’s Stephen Amell as well as the appearance of the “Party Wagon”, in this film a gigantic trash truck that spits manhole covers like a machine gun. It would appear, right at the beginning of the trailer, that we may also get some extra-dimentional involvement which can only mean one thing: Krang. We will see what unfolds on June 3, 2016 but for now, enjoy this first peek at Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: Out of the Shadows.