Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

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(Nicholas Dye/Staff Writer)

Universal dropped the first trailer to the highly anticipated sequel to the highly received sequel to the crappy sequel to the not-so-bad-compared-to-the-third sequel to the highly praised adaptation of Michael Crichton’s Jurassic Park and let me tell you…it was hotter than Ian Malcolm with his shirt open!

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Set several years after the events in Jurassic World, here’s what we know so far. Owen and Claire still have crazy sexual tension. Owen still makes uncomfortable sexual jokes, now about the list of guys that Claire may or may not have nailed. Claire has helped form a dinosaur protection group called the Prevention of Extinction of Dinosaurs Organization or P.E.D.O. for short (actually it’s called the Dinosaur Protection Group so Claire is really involved with DP…seriously). The hamster balls still work!! Blue thinks Owen smells…funny. Ian “Chaos Theory” Malcolm is a goddamned stallion with salt and pepper hair. The Carnotaur (I was a dino-nerd so yeah…I knew what it was) gets a hickey from good ol’ T-Rex. Isla Nublar has filed to legally change it’s name to Dante’s Peak or whatever the volcano was named in that stupid Tommy Lee Jones movie. Claire and (fellow DP enthusiast *snicker*) Justice Smith pull a Thelma and Louise and the Ankylosaur is the unofficial cannonball champion of the world! That pretty much sums up the freaking awesome first trailer for Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom due in theaters June 22nd, 2018. On my ONLY serious note, this trailer does make the departure from most modern trailers and does not oversell. I am truly looking forward to this. Check out the trailer below.

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More Stranger Things To Come..

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(Douglas Porter-Staff Writer)

    They say there are two things inevitable in life, Death and Taxes. Now obviously this phrase is old and dated, as there are many more inevitable things in our day to day non-colonial lifestyles. Something that was obviously inevitable but somehow still need the fanfare to go with it was just announced today by the powers that be at streaming service company Netflix. Stranger Things has been renewed for a 3rd season.

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     Stranger Things has become a transcending show on Netflix. Appealing to the different masses on a level we haven’t seen in pop culture since Game of Thrones and Walking Dead. While no official numbers have ever been released (why they hide these things I don’t know) it was estimated that over 15 million viewers tuned in to the season 2 premiere within its first three days of release on October 27th. Boosting a score of 94% on rotten tomatoes it seems most everybody has agreed that Stranger Things is doing something right. “The Duffer Brothers have again managed to wield their particular alchemy and create a follow-up worthy of the hype created by its predecessor.” Allison Keene of Collider.com said of season 2.

        Minor spoiler warning ahead: Season 2 ends on a minorish cliff-hanger and with no season 3 announcement made prior to its release fans were left up in arms. Netflix has made it a habit of only renewing shows on a season by season basis, with some exceptions Vis-à-vis House of Cards. Using this model has fans salivating at any news that may come from the officials and it is one of the most asked questions of both production staff and the actors. Now I want to put something out on front street with this announcement: Yes we will be getting a season 3….eventually. Yep, no release date was attached to this press release.

   In an interview with indiewire.com, before the announcement of season 3, the Duffer Brother have stated “Season 3 is still so early in it’s stages of development that it hasn’t even gotten the official greenlight. It’s really just Matt and me working with some writers and figuring out where it’s going to go,” said Ross Duffer. So while we know a season 3 will happen it looks like everyone involved s finding the best way to bring us that story.

If you haven’t checked out Stranger Things yet, both seasons 1 and 2 are available for streaming anytime through Netflix. For those of you who are not on the streaming train, a season 1 box set has been released and can found at all major retailers.

 

 

Guardians the Galaxy Vol. 2!!

800x400-guardians-of-the-galaxy-2“I am Groot!!!” That’s how excited I am for this teaser trailer! Let’s get something straight right away. I am a comic fanboy and I love everything Marvel is doing with their films. That being said, there was a huge expectation placed on each and every film that came before Guardians of the Galaxy. I believe the phenomenal success of the first film is completely due to notion that almost NOBODY had read a Guardians comic prior to the film. I will pause here for all of the Cheetos Puff and Mountain Dew Baja Blast fueled outrage aimed at me by those who actually did read a Guardians comic…All out of your system fanboys and girls? Good now pipe down!! I remember when Marvel had announced it’s phases and people look confused about Guardians. Jump to that weekend opening and sweet baby Jesus!! The first film was amazing and it had all to do with the vision of James Gunn as well as the tremendous cast he compiled. I mean come on!! Glenn Close!? Back to present day and I stand here with wet ring around my crotch because I have peed myself with pure joy. This is just a teaser trailer and it doesn’t give us much except the returning major players, the Blue Suede playing in the background, some badass slow walking, and a pretty funny moment between Drax and Peter Quill. Close it out with some Rocket and Baby Groot and you’ve got this guy hooked. Join me in theaters on May 5th, 2017 and you can throw Milk Duds at me while I geek out over the Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2!

(Nicholas Dye/FANBOY and Staff Writer)

 

Star Trek Beyond

(Nicholas Dye/Staff Writer)

In the barrage of new trailers that have  emerged in the last few days, Paramount Pictures decided to take it a step…Beyond. Justin Lin, of The Fast and the Furious series, steps in to fill the director spot left by the departure of J.J. Abrams. Simon Pegg and Doug Jung have written this third installment of the Star Trek series that finally sees the crew of the USS Enterprise embark on their 5 year deep space exploration. Pegg and Jung, decided to venture away from known canon and will introduce us to a new alien baddie in Idris Elba (Thor/Luther) and a new ally in Sofia Boutella (Kingsman). Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, Karl Urban, Zoe Saldana, Simon Pegg, John Cho, and Anton Yelchin all return to command the legendary starship in it’s new adventures and the only question left is whether this ship with have smooth skies without Abrams at the helm. After watching this trailer, I have very high hopes. Star Trek: Beyond hits theaters in REAL D 3D and IMAX 3D on July 22, 2016